The One Where I Slept at 5.30am
01.11.07 (3:01 pm) [edit]I had a serious discussion with Cinta last nite and it ended in the wee hours of the morning. 5.30a.m to be exact.
My cinta had been thru a rough time in his life right now. All he ever wanted is to be heard. To be appreciated for his capabilities on staging a one man show all this while. He complete what is not completed. He puts himself behind to give way to others. Being a perfectionist, he try to satisfies everyone until he can't cope with the pressure. He falls, FALLS HARD.
He was perceived wrongly by the public. People see him as a rich brat but in reality he's just a normal person, just like you and me, trying his hardest best to make ends meet.
I did asked him something last nite which triggers the serious conversation. I didn't mean to hurt him at all. I didn't. That's what I see. That's what others see. He defended himself with constructive points which makes me look bad at the end. I can't imagine how hard it is to be him. But he still survives. Giving up doesn't exist in his life vocabulary. That's the best quality I have found in him. He's a fighter and he still fights for his rights every single day.
To start back what he have left behind is not that damn easy. It's like woken up from a long coma, trying hard to remember back what had happened and try to continue back where you have left behind. Tell me people, are you willing to fill in his shoes? He has lost a portion of his life. Alhamdulillah, he's gaining to get his strength back and I will support him. I will.
The conversation ends up emotionally, tears start to stream down my face. It was hard. Hard for me to swallow that it happened to the one that I love. It's hard to see him falling. Damn hard :(... At the end of the day, it's up to me to give a little ray of sunshine to end his rainy stormy days. I'll work hard for that :). He deserves to be happy and do what matters to him...
I woke up at 8.30a.m, that's a major lateness to work. Hmm.. so much for my new years resolution ahaks... Today, I'm still in a drowsy state. Woke up with a bad case of diarhea, left me so exausted somehow. So if you see me today with a little frown in my face, it's me basically try my hardest best to stay awake as long as possible.
It's officially 1.10pm right now. I'm signing off. Have a bright shiny day !