teddydeath's junkie

The One Where I'm So Into Mr Big

How I love being in CINTA's car as he always enlightened me with the alternative rock in the early 90's.. I feel like I'm living in the 90's music scene itself.. where good songs are being produced... hmmm I was thinking I've been missing a lot at that era.. I could still remember at that time I was so infactuated with boybands... thanks to Smash Hitz magazine.. hiihhi.. I could remember SH cost about RM3.95 with freebies.. yeah.. that cheap.. so everybody could afford it... it was fun...

I could remember that NKOTB, Boyzone and Take That would be my staple bands... ahhhh those cute dreamy guys.. I have all their albums... yeah I've heard of Nirvana at that time but nothing about them that could fancy me... I was living in this boyband world where every love songs seems to have a magic effects to all the girls out there...  I was in my early teens 14 to be exact.. and I only listen to songs with cute guys in it... ahaks... hiihihhihi.. arghhhh those times are magical where love was always in the air...  I was so damn histerical when Boyzone came down to Malaysia for a show... me and my friend were the first ones who went to line up to get good seats (the show was at 9pm and we were there at 8am).... it was good times....

So now.. I feel a bit miserable... ihhiihih... where have I been anyway I've asked myself??...  there's like tons of rock bands with good songs that I've been missing for years.. like the likes of Mr.Big, Foo Fighters, The Cure, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, Rolling Stones, Aerosmith, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Greenday, Offspring, U2 a nd others.. sheshh it's been years that I listen to craps... crappy generated songs for the purpose of profits...sheshhhh... I'm so gonna forgive myself slowly.. hiihhiihihih

I do think that the friends that I hang out with are more towards the safe kinda songs.. ahaks... that's why I have sugary-nice-childhood-fri ends-which-my-parents-app roved-of...  I have the urge to listen to other different bands and songs but I could not afford to do it alone.. I'm scared.. people say that rock is always associated with worshipping the devils...hiihihii.. that's funny

About a year ago I've heard of a song that I really like.. CINTA sang it in the car.. I can't remember what band was it... so sheshhh I was left clueless... so 2 days ago I got the chance to listen it again in CINTA's car.. it was a beautiful song from Mr Big... really.. really beautiful... so I would really like to share it with with all of you out there... please do listen to it when you got a chance... it's soothing to the ear...

"Goin' Where The Wind Blows" - Mr Big

Someone said life is for the taking
Here I am with my hand out waiting for a ride
I've been living on my great expectations
What good is it when I'm stranded here
And the world just passess by
Where are the signs to help me get out of this place
If I should stumble on my moment in time,
How will I know
If the story's written on my face, does it show
Am I strong enough to walk on water
Smart enough to come in out of the rain
Or am I a fool going where the wind blows
Here I sit halfway to somewhere
Thinking about what's in front of me and
what I left behind
On my own, supposed to be so easy
Is this what I've been after
Or have I lost my mind
Maybe this is my chance coming to take me away
If I should stumble on my moment in time,
How will I know
If the story's written on my face, does it show
Am I strong enough to walk on water
Smart enough to come in out of the rain
Or am I a fool going where the wind blows
Here I am walking naked through the world
Taking up space, society's child
Make room for me, make room for me,
make room for me
Am I strong enough to walk on water
Smart enough to come in out of the rain
Or am I a fool
Going where the wind blows
Going where the wind blows
Going where the wind blows
Going where the wind blows

The One Where Earl Grey Tea Served

Wowee it has been a long holiday... I had experienced both good and bad things during those days...

Had the opportunity to sleep over at one of my friends house.. she's married and has a beautiful daughter.. her husband was away and I agreed to accompany her over the holidays.. (see I'm a good friend.. ihhihi).. she lives in this expensive golf course condo in Shah Alam... had to take the commuter from KL Sentral... the train was packed with immigrants.. and I was scared throughout the journey... just hold on I guess..

So I arrived in Shah Alam, CINTA picked me up from there.. so he send me up to my friend's home... never been to this part of Shah Alam before.. CINTA said it was the best condominium there in Shah Alam, security is pretty tight.. the road was clear and calm.. there was no people around cause of the festive holidays.... we went to the drive-thru McD and ordered some stuffs... it has been long that I haven't been to a drive-thru.. it's kinda fun...

So off he sent me to my friend's house... her posh condo was big and spacious.. kinda cool.. she married a wealthy-mid-30 man.. so she was pretty much lucky cause she doesn't have to work... her husband is the sole provider bless with multi-million dollars contracts... she was showered with wealth since she got married...  everything was branded...  arghhh I got jealous there... she got everything that she wanted...  it was her destiny to live that way I guess... 

it's almost been 1 year that I haven't seen her daughter.. she was growing up pretty fast... she's so cute and adorable.. had a brief chat with my friend and then when to sleep in one of her guest room.. so I wake up the next day.. she was preparing breakfast for me.. ohh shucks... it's been long I haven't been treated like that.. feel pampered for a while.. played with her daughter.. watch tv.. chit chat.. that's the on going activity that I ever did for almost 2 days.. I was getting BORED... and in and out of the days.. we were stuck in the golf club compound.. the store was closed due to the chinese new year...  I feel a bit trapped there...

she had this misunderstood situation with her hubby... so they we quarrelling over the phone.. I was pretty shocked... it was not a pretty sight.. and the daughter had been a victim in this situation.. I couldn't stand the shouting and beating... it was horrible.. my friend became vicious.. I was scared.. she turned into someone that I didn't knew... everything that her daughter did was wrong.. and she continued with the shouting and beating... I called CINTA.. I can't stand being in this abusive environment anymore... I was totally scared... I was feeling sorry for the poor child.. I tried to defend the child... it didn't work... my heart was aching... how I wish she would stop treating her daughter like that.. I've heard she said "Kang mampos budak nih aku kerjakan"..(I think sooner or later I will kill this child...).. I was in an awkward position... I feel weird.. I have to get out from there....

On the 3rd day... the quarell worsen... my friend don't have any more mood to talk.. so I was barely alone... doing my own stuffs which was of course sleep throughout the day... sheshh.. it was terrible... the best moment came when CINTA called me and telling me that he was waiting for me in the lobby...  I exchanged my goodbye's to my friend... glad it was over for me there.. but I'm still scared for her daughters sake... sometimes you can't take action even though it's right in front of ur eyes... that's what happened...........

I hang out with CINTA... watching Helter Skelter and Dawn of The Deads.. it was an amazing outing.... we were up until late... it was the best moment ever... being together and doing the things that we love so much... aaahhhhh... it was moments up for keeps...  he made Earl Grey tea for me... ohhh shucks.... I just love it...  I wish I could stay in that moment forever.... if I could freeze time.. I would chose those time that I spend with him... no doubt about it...

hmmm.... time does past by so fast... it's Monday and I miss him so damn much.. yeah it's valentine's day... we don't celebrate it cause for us every moment that we've spend together is way better than valentine's day.... no need to spend a lot of cash on flowers and chocolates... watching good dvd's + while cuddling + sip of earl grey would be the most romantic moments ever..... 

so to CINTA --> thank you & I love ya so much

to my friend (u know who u r)---> please stop the things that you do.. it will ONLY hurt the baby gurl phisically and emotionally... plzzzzz listen to me.....

to everybody else --> have a wonderful valentine's day with ur love ones!

take care....

The One Where I Found Out

heyaaa... it's been long I might say... ohh well I was busy with work and my daily life.. yes I do have one right now since I don't know when... ahaks

Cinta was with me and what more could I ask?.. (I've always want to be with him since the first day that i met him anyway... it was on top of my wish list every damn year) I'm NOT gonna be greedy... I'm comfortable with the way things are right now...

Oh yeah.. I have a confession to make.. usually ..hmmm this is hard to put out in words.... (please people don't be mad at me after this!!) actually I don't prefer to hang out with anyone who smokes.. ouchhhh... that is a harsh statement to some people right???.....

it is not because I hate them.. it's just I can't stand the smell of the  smoke.. I'll get dizzy... well the fact that I have asthma, kinda make it logical right??... so can't blame me throughly though... hmmmm well  Alright... to end the story short.. my brother and CINTA smokes... ironically I just found out about that....

hmmm... caught my bro first 2 months ago which was a bit awkward though... so we kept it from our mom until our li'l bro broke the news out.. he's still smoke in the the hiding... not in front of our parents.. just found 'bout CINTA recently..  he says is it gonna be a problem between us? well I said NO.. I'm NOT gonna love him lesser even after I found out.. it would be so ridiculous if I would dump somebody cause he smokes... that's not gonna happened to my life story.... he's gonna be the same person that I fell for.. nothing is gonna change that..

so plzzz.... I love to hang out with my friends.. if they wanna smoke just go ahead.. Some might ask 1st if it's ok..and that is so sweet... well.. to tell u the truth I don't mind now... enough said

Ok back to reality....

Had dinner with CINTA last week for the 1st time this year... it was in Ukay Perdana.. we had the Mama Mia's pizza + mango juice + ice lemon tea... it was amazing.. like going on a 1st date again and again.. hihihiihih

We talk, we eat, we laugh, we talk, we eat, we laugh + smoke event..... it was weird at first though... I never seen him do it before.. but yeah have to get use to it from now on.. hell it's not gonna be an issue.. it shouldn't have...

we have each other... nothing can beat that...